The thing is you might already know what you need to do. Let’s be honest about this. You know you need to exercise more. You know you should stop scrolling through social media at midnight. You know that job application isn’t going to write itself. You know exactly what needs to change. The problem isn’t…
“The map is not the territory.” Alfred Korzybski wrote this early last century, and it’s one of those phrases that sounds obvious until you realise how completely most people ignore it. They confuse the description of reality with reality itself, the menu with the meal, the guidebook with the journey. And then they wonder why…
This article moves away from ostriches and moves us onto elephants. I’m sure you have heard of the expression “don’t mention the elephant in the room,” which refers to an issue that’s so big, that is just so obvious to all, but although being obvious nobody is wanting to confront it. And here’s what you…
Sometimes when a person gets stuck in a problem, it’s because having that problem gives that person some form of benefit. This effect causes a cognitive bias called primary gain, which can often influence a person’s decision making whilst also making it harder to get rid of that problem. And here’s the uncomfortable truth you…
When an elephant is young, a common practice historically was to attach its hind leg via a chain to a strong unmovable post or tree, so that when it’s chained up, it knows it can’t get away. It takes about two months for the young elephant to stop struggling against the chain, and from then…
Previously, we discussed primary gain, which is the tendency for people to seek reward and avoid pain. The ‘primary’ in primary gain refers to the fact that the behaviour, or the thing that person does or doesn’t do, is giving them a direct benefit. You eat chocolate because it tastes good. You avoid exercise because…
You’re surrounded by people who are holding you back. Not deliberately. Not maliciously. They probably love you. They probably want what’s best for you. But they’re still holding you back because you’ve been conditioned from birth to conform to the group you’re in, and if that group isn’t going anywhere, neither are you. This is…
A high proportion of people do as they’re told. They go through life ticking boxes, keeping to the rules, conforming, thoroughly playing their part in society as a whole. And there’s nothing wrong with that. Society functions because most people follow most rules most of the time. We drive on the correct side of the…
You’re about to learn about a syndrome that doesn’t appear in any medical textbook, any psychiatric manual, or any psychology journal. Yet I can guarantee with almost absolute certainty that once you understand what it is, you’ll start noticing it everywhere. In yourself. In your colleagues. In your friends. Probably in at least three conversations…
Before we move on, it’s worth taking a moment to look at how far you’ve actually come. We started by looking at you. How you think. How your thinking is shaped by biases you probably weren’t even aware of. How those biases quietly distort your decisions, keep you stuck in the same patterns, and make…