We’ve spent the last two lessons on the people who can genuinely harm you. Most of the people in your life aren’t like that, but that doesn’t mean every relationship is equally good for you either. Some people build you up. Some quietly drain you. Most just pass through without much effect either way. Knowing…
In the last lesson we talked about sociopaths and psychopaths in fairly general terms; who they are, how common they are, how they operate. This time I want to make it concrete, because it’s easy to nod along with the theory and quietly assume it doesn’t apply to your life. It does. Genuine, real-life “villains”…
People love to say that nobody’s out to get you. That paranoia is irrational. That most people are fundamentally decent, and you’re just being negative. Most of the time, they’re absolutely right, most people aren’t actively plotting your downfall, that is, until you meet one that is. Sometimes there actually are predators, call them villains,…
Nobody tells you, when you’re growing up, that the single biggest factor in whether your life goes well or badly isn’t your intelligence, your talent, your work ethic, or even your luck. It’s the people around you. That’s it. That’s the whole secret. The people you surround yourself with will determine more about your outcomes…
You’re doing it again. You’ve just taken what I said, twisted it through your mental gymnastics machine, and spat it back out as something I never actually meant. You’re sitting there asking, “So you’re saying if I don’t do this perfectly, I’m a complete failure?” No. That’s not what I’m saying. That’s what you’re hearing…
You’re about to learn about a syndrome that doesn’t appear in any medical textbook, any psychiatric manual, or any psychology journal. Yet I can guarantee with almost absolute certainty that once you understand what it is, you’ll start noticing it everywhere. In yourself. In your colleagues. In your friends. Probably in at least three conversations…
Before I go any further, let me be clear about something. I’m not suggesting you’re some kind of narcissistic sociopath hell-bent on destroying everyone and everything around you. But I am about to tell you about a cognitive bias that might make you look in the mirror and wince a bit. Because all of these…
I’ve never actually seen a person with a halo above their head. Yet every single day, I watch good-looking people, popular people, and charismatic people get more credence in meetings than they really should be getting. I see attractive people in adverts selling you watches, perfumes, and lifestyles you don’t need. And I see you…
A high proportion of people do as they’re told. They go through life ticking boxes, keeping to the rules, conforming, thoroughly playing their part in society as a whole. And there’s nothing wrong with that. Society functions because most people follow most rules most of the time. We drive on the correct side of the…
I have two kids. Let’s just say there’s very often a bit of healthy sibling rivalry going on between them. Actually, scratch that. “Healthy” might be overselling it. Sometimes it’s more like a Cold War with occasional hot skirmishes over who gets the last biscuit or who sits in the front seat of the car….