The Significance of No-shows: A Lack of Commitment to Change

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This Article discussed the significance of no shows, an all too common occurrence in people caught in a cycle of unresolved problems.


In our quest for personal growth and improvement, it is essential to surround ourselves with individuals who share our determination to overcome challenges and find solutions. However, one common phenomenon that often arises is the absence of individuals who fail to show up when it matters most. Whether it be a support group meeting, a therapy session, or even a simple conversation, people not turning up can often be an indication of their lack of real commitment to change or finding solutions to their problems. In this blog, we will delve into the reasons why this behavior occurs and its implications on personal growth and development.

  1. Lack of Ownership

When individuals fail to show up for meetings or appointments, it suggests a lack of ownership for their own problems or challenges. True commitment to change requires acknowledging the importance of taking responsibility for one’s actions and actively seeking solutions. By avoiding these opportunities, individuals may inadvertently be avoiding facing their issues head-on and potentially hindering their personal growth.

  1. Fear of Change

Change can be intimidating, even when it is necessary for personal development. Some individuals may harbor a fear of change due to the uncertainty it brings or the potential discomfort associated with confronting their problems. By not showing up, they may be trying to maintain the status quo and avoid the necessary discomfort that comes with growth and transformation.

  1. Lack of Motivation

Motivation is a driving force that propels us towards our goals. However, when individuals fail to show up, it could signify a lack of genuine motivation to change their circumstances. It is crucial to understand that change requires effort, dedication, and consistent action. Without intrinsic motivation, the commitment to finding solutions wavers, and progress becomes challenging to achieve.

  1. Resistance to Vulnerability

Addressing personal issues often requires vulnerability and openness. Some individuals find it difficult to expose their vulnerabilities to others, even in a supportive environment. By not showing up, they may be avoiding the discomfort of opening up and sharing their struggles, thereby limiting their chances of finding effective solutions.

Implications for Personal Growth

No-shows can have significant implications for personal growth and development. Individuals who consistently fail to show up may find themselves stuck in a cycle of unresolved issues and missed opportunities. Without actively engaging in the process of change, personal growth becomes stagnant, and problems persist.

However, it is important to note that not every missed appointment or meeting indicates a lack of commitment. There may be valid reasons such as emergencies or unforeseen circumstances. It is essential to approach each situation with empathy and understanding.


The absence of individuals during crucial moments can serve as a red flag for their commitment to change and finding solutions to their problems. Lack of ownership, fear of change, lack of motivation, and resistance to vulnerability are some of the reasons why people may not turn up. To achieve personal growth, it is vital to recognize the significance of these absences and address them accordingly. By fostering a genuine commitment to change, individuals can unlock their potential, overcome obstacles, and embark on a path of transformative personal growth.

The idea for this article came to me whilst twiddling my thumbs waiting for patients, after a series of no shows.

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