Self-confidence is generally accepted as something of a necessity if you want to be successful.
If you have low self confidence you in effect create a barrier that you will need to break through just to start doing what you need to do to get what you really want out of life. Without self confidence you let opportunity pass you by and before long life does the same.
Fortunately self confidence and belief in your own abilities is made up from a number of components, and the good thing for those with low self confidence is that you can build up the major components to help you get the confidence you need to achieve whatever your goals are.
Three key components to improving your self confidence are; to become motivated, improve your self talk and to repeatedly practice visualising your goals.
These elements complement each other and are present in varied amounts from person to person, their combination in the right amounts act like a catalyst to break you away from the self doubt that’s holding you back, and enable you to breakthrough the barrier that fear puts in front of you.
1. Become motivated to build self confidence.
Motivation comes from the two ‘p’s which are pain, and purpose.
The pain of motivation may come from the desperation you have inside to change your life circumstances, or from the previous failures and knock backs that you have taken which then hurt enough so that you tell yourself never again as you get yourself back up, dust yourself down and ready yourself to try again.
Failure hurts, either real failure, or fear of failure it doesn’t matter it still hurts and this is the element that drives some people on again and again.
“I’ve missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I’ve been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.”
Whilst failure drives you forward, purpose pulls you forward, it gives you meaning, clarity and direction through difficult and unsure times. When someone has purpose they stand tall, they have a higher goal and become driven.
Purpose may be to provide or protect family, your faith or whatever you feel you are destined to achieve in your life, whatever your purpose is, it doesn’t really matter, what matters is that you have purpose, because with purpose you can sustain a consistency that others can’t, you become oblivious to small inconveniences and develop a sense of self, you start to define who you are.
Real motivation is more than just a bit of carrot and stick, real motivation is the stuff that comes from deep inside, and this inner motivation is the stuff that really matters and with this type of motivation self confidence is not too far away.
2. Improve your self talk to build Self Confidence.
Have you ever doubted yourself, I’m sure from time to time all of us have because there’s always times when doubt or negativity effects even the strongest will, self doubt tends to nag away, it chips away at your confidence and self esteem, the strange thing is that most of this doubt comes from a little voice inside your head, this little voice is called your self talk.
Your self talk can be a running commentary of all of the problems in your life, the negative things in the world around you and a collection of the worst things that could possibly happen to you at any given time.
Alternatively your self talk can be positive, it can spur you on and it can reassure you of your purpose. What you say to yourself repeatedly and how you say it can become habitual, with some simple training your brain can be trained to say the right things more and generally say things better.
If I was to say the classic “don’t think of the purple elephant” you still think of the purple elephant, imagine then that we aren’t talking about purple elephants and instead what you are thinking about are the good or the bad things in your life. Then you can understand the power of changing your self talk, because self talk can create the images that bubble up into your consciousness, just like that purple elephant your self talk creates some of the thoughts that ruminate in your mind.
Being positive or negative as a person is dependent to some degree on your self talk, their are huge advantages of having positive self talk, improving your self talk improves your self confidence, it creates the effect of building you up thought by thought, rather than chipping away at your self esteem and because your feelings follow your thoughts, if you think good thoughts you feel good too.
Here is a link to an article on the ways you can change your self talk.
3. Use Visualisation to build your Self Confidence.
In short ‘Visualisation, is a techniques that you can use to cement your goals, to build motivation, and to tap into your unconscious mind in order to achieve what you want to do.
Sportsmen do it, people who want to perform at the peek of their abilities do it and by visualising yourself doing what you want to do not only do you rehearse it in your mind you cement it into your unconsciousness.
By visualising you fill in the gaps around your goals, they become clear and well defined, as a bonus you may even get some clarity on the bigger picture and your purpose.
By visualising your goals you focus the mind, you are creating a reality about what you are wanting to achieve, and this does wonders to your self confidence. Even if you have only visualised what you are aspiring to do if the mind has visualised you doing this before it means you will be better prepared, you will have better control of your state and you will perform better on the day.
Visualisation uses images, and that’s the language of the unconscious mind, visualisation programs your brain to work out in the background what it needs to do to make what you are visualising a reality. You see opportunity, next steps become apparent, and as mentioned before you define and focus on your goals, for more information about visualisation and how to do it effectively follow this link http://juvenate.orgusing-
Self Confidence Summary.
By having the correct amount of self confidence you can break thought the threshold of what’s holding you back, you can develop self confidence by becoming motivated by tapping into the pain of fear and failure or by developing a purpose to drive you on. Your self confidence can be built up by positive self talk, which also has the advantage of effecting the thoughts that pop into your mind throughout the day, and by visualisation you become focused on your goals, you become confident in their achievement and you get clarity on what you really want to do.